This last part is the beginning
Can you ever recall? Recall a time when you were watching, or listening to something, and you just felt this relation? It felt surreal. The relation you felt to the medium you were tuned into seemed very, strong. You felt this strong vibe, this connection. You felt as if what you were tuned into was describing something that was related to you yet, it seemed so hard to put into picture about what it really was. You might not realise that it might be related to you, or your past, or maybe your present predicament, but still, you just felt so attached to it. It might have been a song, a video, a movie, a conversation, a porn video, a drawing. Yes the extremes are so far-fetched but yet, you just couldn't explain the reason why you were so attracted to it.
Well, in the case of this experience, it just goes to show: You're not alone; There are others out there that has had the same experiences as you. Yes maybe you might have misinterpreted the purpose of what you have related yourself to, but one man's meat, is another man's poison.
We all have different perceptions of the things that surrounds us. And in this case, the case which I'm about to share, this boy feels a connection to a certain video he has just recently watched. It's a music video. The video translated the lyrics so well that this boy was just speechless when he saw it. Don't laugh. The video is Justin Timberlake's latest single,"What Goes Around... / ...Comes Around".
I was talking to him on the phone. And yeah, he was telling me about the video he just recently caught. Here's what he had to say:
You see, the way he was left alone was something that kinda hurt him alot. Till this day. Yes he made his mistakes. But now, he realises that well, it was kinda unjustified, the way she left him.
She loved someone else, and she gave up. Gave up on reviving the relationship. It was something that he never knew. He never knew that she was in love with someone else till she told him days later. He was begging her, on his knees, asking her to give him one more chance. Time and time again, she refused. He kept asking her why she didn't want to give him a chance. She kept refusing to reveal it. She kept refusing. But I guess she could only take so much of pressure. She finally broke down, and told him this. These words, like shards of glass, pierced through his skin, and dug deep down into his heart. In a shovel-like digging action, it just tore every single part of his heart. These words killed him. She said,"I like someone else already."
That moment, after that very last syllable of that very last word, his heart stopped. Really, it did. And all of a sudden, it seemed as if his world was twirling. No, he wasn't exaggerating when he was describing this to me because, well, I could feel his pain at that time.
At first, on the night of the break-up, she just told him that the feelings weren't there. At that time, he just couldn't understand why she had lost her feelings. He couldn't remember what he did wrong. And although he couldn't remember what he did wrong, he kept blaming himself about the break-up. And yes, even after she finally told him the real reason, he still blamed himself. He never wanted to make it look like it was ever her fault.
She just killed him instantaneously.
Day by day, for a short period of time after the break-up he kept in contact with her. Yes he was depressed, and he couldn't think properly. She was everything for him.
He was very nice to her. He wanted to win her heart again, but all he ever did was sell himself away. He showed how pathetic he could be. Now, he just realised that he gave himself to her for her to use him. She never requested his help, but he did that on his own will. And now, he realised how stupid he was.
You see, she was having problems with the guy that she was with. And being so concerned for her at that time, he talked to her. He consoled her. She was just in his mind 24-hours. He just cared so much for her, but yet, when he looks at it now, did she care for him? All she ever did was use the advice to her benefit alone. What did he get in return? More pain and suffering.
He never realised this part of the break-up till he was watching the video. All along, he kept telling himself that it was his fault. No, he'll never push all the blame to her. He might have made his mistakes, and she made hers, but looking at it, he doesn't give a fuck now. What she did, to keep the reasons away from him, to kill him, he doesn't give a fuck. Sub-consciously, he knows that he made some mistakes, but now, he doesn't give a fuck.
And while he was talking to me, he suddenly cried in delight. He was kinda excited. You know why? Because he finally realised why he felt such a strong connection with the video and the song.
Because, after all that was done, after all that she did to him, all the pain, he told her this:
"Hey, after what you've done to me, just remember, what goes around comes around."
And do you remember what the title of the video? Yes. Disturbing huh?
So yes, that's the reason why he felt such a strong connection to that video. It's funny cause, he didn't know the reason why till a few days after watching it. When he first watched it, he just felt this strong connection to it, and after a few days of analysing the video and the lyrics, he finally knew why. If he hadn't had cross-referred his experience and his memories to the video, he would have never knew why he was so attracted to it.
And yes, in a way, this video has made him realise so many things. Things that others were trying to put across to him, but he never wanted to listen. He's the kind of boy that opens his own eyes. He needs to go through situations himself to realise something.
No, he doesn't blame her for everything, but looking at the how much he went through for her, just to get rejected at the end, it wasn't worth it. She was not worth his love. She was not worthy of anything from him.
Yes, he has finally realised this last part.
And, I just have a feeling that it would be less frequent he's gonna call me. I won't feel that he was using me to gain sympathy because, he has taught me alot of things. He had made me open my eyes. HE has opened my eyes. His stories were lessons for me.
And yes, I know that he hopes his stories will help those who's gone through so much. He was reluctant to share his stories, but the prospect of helping many was just too much to reject.
Yes, he might have taken a long time, near a year to be exact, to realise this. But I know him. He takes a long time to recover.
Let's hope this is the beginning of something new for him.
LAter
Well, in the case of this experience, it just goes to show: You're not alone; There are others out there that has had the same experiences as you. Yes maybe you might have misinterpreted the purpose of what you have related yourself to, but one man's meat, is another man's poison.
We all have different perceptions of the things that surrounds us. And in this case, the case which I'm about to share, this boy feels a connection to a certain video he has just recently watched. It's a music video. The video translated the lyrics so well that this boy was just speechless when he saw it. Don't laugh. The video is Justin Timberlake's latest single,"What Goes Around... / ...Comes Around".
I was talking to him on the phone. And yeah, he was telling me about the video he just recently caught. Here's what he had to say:
You see, the way he was left alone was something that kinda hurt him alot. Till this day. Yes he made his mistakes. But now, he realises that well, it was kinda unjustified, the way she left him.
She loved someone else, and she gave up. Gave up on reviving the relationship. It was something that he never knew. He never knew that she was in love with someone else till she told him days later. He was begging her, on his knees, asking her to give him one more chance. Time and time again, she refused. He kept asking her why she didn't want to give him a chance. She kept refusing to reveal it. She kept refusing. But I guess she could only take so much of pressure. She finally broke down, and told him this. These words, like shards of glass, pierced through his skin, and dug deep down into his heart. In a shovel-like digging action, it just tore every single part of his heart. These words killed him. She said,"I like someone else already."
That moment, after that very last syllable of that very last word, his heart stopped. Really, it did. And all of a sudden, it seemed as if his world was twirling. No, he wasn't exaggerating when he was describing this to me because, well, I could feel his pain at that time.
At first, on the night of the break-up, she just told him that the feelings weren't there. At that time, he just couldn't understand why she had lost her feelings. He couldn't remember what he did wrong. And although he couldn't remember what he did wrong, he kept blaming himself about the break-up. And yes, even after she finally told him the real reason, he still blamed himself. He never wanted to make it look like it was ever her fault.
She just killed him instantaneously.
Day by day, for a short period of time after the break-up he kept in contact with her. Yes he was depressed, and he couldn't think properly. She was everything for him.
He was very nice to her. He wanted to win her heart again, but all he ever did was sell himself away. He showed how pathetic he could be. Now, he just realised that he gave himself to her for her to use him. She never requested his help, but he did that on his own will. And now, he realised how stupid he was.
You see, she was having problems with the guy that she was with. And being so concerned for her at that time, he talked to her. He consoled her. She was just in his mind 24-hours. He just cared so much for her, but yet, when he looks at it now, did she care for him? All she ever did was use the advice to her benefit alone. What did he get in return? More pain and suffering.
He never realised this part of the break-up till he was watching the video. All along, he kept telling himself that it was his fault. No, he'll never push all the blame to her. He might have made his mistakes, and she made hers, but looking at it, he doesn't give a fuck now. What she did, to keep the reasons away from him, to kill him, he doesn't give a fuck. Sub-consciously, he knows that he made some mistakes, but now, he doesn't give a fuck.
And while he was talking to me, he suddenly cried in delight. He was kinda excited. You know why? Because he finally realised why he felt such a strong connection with the video and the song.
Because, after all that was done, after all that she did to him, all the pain, he told her this:
"Hey, after what you've done to me, just remember, what goes around comes around."
And do you remember what the title of the video? Yes. Disturbing huh?
So yes, that's the reason why he felt such a strong connection to that video. It's funny cause, he didn't know the reason why till a few days after watching it. When he first watched it, he just felt this strong connection to it, and after a few days of analysing the video and the lyrics, he finally knew why. If he hadn't had cross-referred his experience and his memories to the video, he would have never knew why he was so attracted to it.
And yes, in a way, this video has made him realise so many things. Things that others were trying to put across to him, but he never wanted to listen. He's the kind of boy that opens his own eyes. He needs to go through situations himself to realise something.
No, he doesn't blame her for everything, but looking at the how much he went through for her, just to get rejected at the end, it wasn't worth it. She was not worth his love. She was not worthy of anything from him.
Yes, he has finally realised this last part.
And, I just have a feeling that it would be less frequent he's gonna call me. I won't feel that he was using me to gain sympathy because, he has taught me alot of things. He had made me open my eyes. HE has opened my eyes. His stories were lessons for me.
And yes, I know that he hopes his stories will help those who's gone through so much. He was reluctant to share his stories, but the prospect of helping many was just too much to reject.
Yes, he might have taken a long time, near a year to be exact, to realise this. But I know him. He takes a long time to recover.
Let's hope this is the beginning of something new for him.
LAter
posted by Ravinder Singh at
21:22
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