Debauchery

It feels like a big joke is being pulled on me.

All these years, years where my unwavering optimism has been the one key feature people see in me, I've realised it's all a joke. A big fat painful joke. A joke life is pulling off, me being the butt of it.

I have got no faith in anything. There is no fate. No such thing as destiny. Because if there is, I would be smiling. By now, after all that I've been through, I would be finally smiling, with full sincerity.

Fuck you. Just fuck you. You've made me cry more than I could ever imagine, tormented worst than a rape victim. Yes, I'm looking above, at you. To tell you. Fuck you.